Even though this is listed as number 12, this is the real first missive. I wrote a letter to a good friend after finding out a dangerous secret when we were 15 or 16. Once I had crumbled the loose-leaf I had been carefully wording my concerns on, and resigned myself to silence, I broke out a five star spiral notebook and scribbled this out a handful of pages in. It’s 12 only in that that was how many pages I buried it into the notebook that would soon become the home of all 215 misplaced missives.
What I really want to say to you,
I know I can never say.
It would break you to know,
And it would break me to say. Continue reading Misplaced Missive #12 – Knowing
I wrote you a letter the other day.
It sits in a notebook tucked out of the way.
I wish I was daring enough to send it,
But I fear if I do, everything will change. Continue reading Misplaced Missive #11 – Your Poem
I hate you – for all you haven’t done.
All the acts the title was meant to convey,
All the lessons you were supposed to bestow
Upon your impressionable offspring every day. Continue reading Misplaced Missive #10 – Gone Forever
After all you’ve been, and all you’ve done,
How can you take as contemporary gospel,
That you’re God’s chosen one?
Have you repressed our history?
I wish I could.
I’ve tried enough for a lifetime.
If God deems you worthy,
Then that’s a god I can’t abide. Continue reading Misplaced Missive #8 – Either Or
Young and insecure,
Constantly searching for:
Of feelings better forgotten.
So besotted; so taken
I faithfully deny unhealthy devotions,
Set in motion to distract and subtract,
From thought-worthy worries and woes. Continue reading Misplaced Missive #114 – 1 Good Reason
Some Say Love
It began with a kiss.
The way many betrayals do.
A lapse in judgment
that swiftly led to two. Continue reading Moonlit Musing – Semantics
I blare the music
To ensnare my mind
To spare myself the memory
Of the mayhem you voiced tonight – Continue reading Misplaced Missive #210 – Background Music
Set in between my black heart and your white lies,
Grey eyed wisdom is overshadowed by extremes,
But I need: Some guidance, some advice,
‘Cause I do not know what is right.
I turn away and you tell me to stay,
I stay put and hate myself for being weak,
I don’t know where to find the answers I seek. Continue reading Misplaced Missive #203 – All The Colors That You Shine
It’s three walls closing in around you and the only open exit is a cliff edge leading to a pit of spikes. But slowly. Creeping death as Metallica would have it. And it’s all the more tangible for being so slow, because you can see and feel and dread it coming, but there seems like no way to stop it without making everything exponentially worse.
So you freeze. Continue reading Moonlit Musing – Anxiety.
I’ve been back in Maryland for a total of 12 days. And while I can see the pros of being home, the cons have been weighing heavy. I haven’t been posting in the chaos and my mood has been… lower than where I like it. Part of it is the depression that always shadows a birthday for me, but the other part seems to be guilt and regret. I’m trying to shake off the melancholy, but I wanted to warn you lovely readers that for the foreseeable future, I may get a little dark. Continue reading Album Share and Mood Update